There I sat; head spinning, tears flowing and heart aching. Crying out to God that I couldn't take this anymore. My world was falling out of control, crumbling around me.
The past 2 years had been so trying and hard. I had prayed, I had sought God's will, I stood when I had done everything I knew to do and I was constantly "faking it till I made it" but still, nothing was changing and things seemed to progressively be getting worse.
I will never forget that day. Tears stinging my eyes as I cried out to Jesus. Laying on my bed feeling as though the heaviness of the world was sitting on my chest.
Then, I heard the Lord as clear as anything......"Yes, your world does seem out of control because it is not YOU that controls it. Surrender to me, dear child, you will see I am the one who will take control. You rest, it isn't your burden to bare"
It was amazing. The God of the universe bent down to whisper those words to me.....little ol' me. I stood up that day, brushed myself off and knew that even though I had been doing what I thought I should, I still wasn't giving up control of the situation. I was still trying to manipulate it to be the way I thought it should be. That day, I surrendered. I gave it all to Jesus.
I would be lying if I said that circumstances changed that day. Although I have seen improvement, the main thing that changed was my heart. Regardless of the outcome, I know that God is on the throne and I am choosing to allow Him full control over this situation. Peace rests in my heart today because I know that I will be ok.
I encourage you today, friend, to surrender your heart and life to Jesus. There is no other peace like the peace that Jesus brings. No matter what storm you are facing, rest in knowing that HE is in control.
"Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10